Below you’ll find excerpts from my latest short stories. All of my works are open to constructive criticism.
Word Count: 1569
Constructive criticism is always welcomed!
Raveek tried not to show his impatience as his younger sister, Lareen, looked at herself in the mirror. She brushed her hair yet again and pursed her lips.
"You look fine,” he told her.
“Today is a big deal. I want to look better than fine,” she countered. She put on more makeup and then appeared to take it off with a small rag.
He sighed and sat down her bed. Today may have taken him an extra five minutes to get ready. Maybe. “We’re going to be late at this rate. You look beautiful without the makeup. If you look any more beautiful, people will think you’re a goddess.”
She smiled at him in the mirror. “Won’t you make your future wife happy?”
“Yes, yes, now can we go?”
Word Count: 1226 (1256 if you count the "disclaimer" lol)
Prompt: ‘Say the Word’ – “Rick struggles to cope.” @ Brigit's Flame
Rick could feel the predator staring at him in the darkness. He wasn't sure where the monster was, but he knew it was stalking him. He had been trying to fall asleep when he felt its presence, and now he was worried about moving in fear of provoking the beast into sinking its teeth in his vulnerable flesh.
What was he going to do?
He looked at his girlfriend sleeping beside him. He envied her ignorance to the lurking danger. He was so exhausted - if only the monster would kill him instead of toying with him like this night after night. How long had it been since he had a full night's sleep?
He shifted his leg to get more comfortable and instantly regretted it. The sharp pain from teeth piercing his leg made him jump up from the bed.
Word count: 399
Prompt: The beginnings of all things are small
You hear the sound of an incoming text message and look down at your phone for no more than 30 seconds, but it's all that it takes to crash into another car. You see the woman you hit passed out against the steering wheel with blood pouring from her head.
You're rushed to the hospital and learn you will need to stay a few days. You lie in your new bed and watch the news. You see the woman's face from the car and turn up the volume. Reporters say she's unconscious and has a traumatic brain injury; the doctors don't think she will survive.
Word count: 349
Four years, eleven months, and twenty days
since my life has been on pause.
Seven days until I can push play
I'm not sure I'll make it.
The other prisoners know it's coming,
and they're doing their best to provoke me into a fight
"Stealing my time" they call it.
If I fight them, I'll be punished
put into solitary confinement
and my seven days will be replaced with months.
Four years, eleven months, and twenty-one days
I've made it this far, I can make it six more days, right?
Word count: 192
Constructive criticism is welcomed!
Three, six, nine
The goose drank wine
The monkey chewed tobacco
On the streetcar line
I remember my little girl singing those words when she jumped rope outside. I would watch her from my spot on the steps, and I wished I could jump too.
But dolls can't jump.
I watched her as she slept. I smiled as she dreamt and wished I could dream too.
But dolls can't dream.
I stayed by her side when she was afraid of the monster under her bed and the shadows in the room. I tried to whisper comforting words.
But dolls can't whisper.
I wanted to scream when he came. I wanted to wake her as he snuck in through the window and pressed his hand down on her face to silence her.
Word count: 145
Constructive criticism is welcomed!
I put the car in park and walk up to my childhood home that's now for sale. The tree in the front calls to me. I stare up at the knothole that I used to think was the gateway to Narnia. It reminds me of To Kill a Mockingbird and summertime and the tree house I wanted to build but never did. As a sapling, this tree walked all over the yard while...